Stepping out.

My husband and I first ‘stepped out’ in February 2004. We met for the first time at a church service - I was playing the piano with the worship group, and at the end of the service noticed a newcomer, a stranger, a giant of a man-mountain.

A few short steps later, we were engaged and married in the October of that year. I know a lot of people thought we were ‘crazy’ - that it was too soon, that we didn’t know each other well enough, that it would all end in tears. And, that first year of marriage was tough; but we knew, we knew God was in the relationship, we knew that if we stepped out in faith and stepped forward together in faith, that we would always be on the right path. Together.

We stepped out of our boundaries again six years ago, when we were asked by Social Services to foster our four nephews and nieces, aged 6-17. Becoming an immediate parent under such emotionally difficult circumstances required trust, patience, more trust and a whole lot more patience. We weren’t equipped to be parents, yet we somehow found ourselves full of love, full of laughter, full of tears. God provided for us in ways we would never have suspected, graced us with provisions and gifts from unsuspected corners, and taught us a new way of loving.

Life is so much about steps. These days they are counted by little watches that tell you to step out and step further and for longer. Keep on that treadmill, push yourself, reach your goals! But these little devices don’t guide or teach or train. They don’t encourage you to take a different path, and they don’t hold you up when you stumble. They don’t enable you to reach your ultimate goal, or help you map out a pathway to get there.

But, our lives do have a map. I know this, for sure, deep within me. ‘“For I know the plans I have for you,” says the LORD. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.’ (Jeremiah 29v11)
I have known this verse - it has travelled with me since it was written on the back of an embroidered picture my great grandfather gave me when I was born. And when I was baptised at the age of 14, it was my baptism verse. It was read at our wedding.

These plans have included many friendships. Our friends have held us up, and at every stage of our pre-married and married lives we can point to significant people who have prayed for us, guided us, been that support and prop that at the time we didn’t even know we needed. Life has been nothing without these God-given people. Sometimes, through the power of the Holy Spirit, it is them alone who can wrap their arms around you, steady you, push you off, and catch you when you teeter and fall. It are these God-given friendships who have helped us to reach who we are, here and now.

And so, 13 years later, we find ourselves stepping out again. In trust, I have handed in my notice as a teacher. The kitchen is painted (half painted… but it’s a start) in preparation before estate agents descend, and nearly every cupboard (nearly!) has been sorted and the local charity shop now has lots of lovely new-to-them things to sell. These preparations are our baby steps - our one step forward at a time steps - because in August we move to a small ‘town’ 325 miles away where as a couple we enter full time Ministry. This time stepping out is going to take more than our strength and the strength of our friends and family. This time, the abundant life ahead of us will be entirely shaped by our commitment to Christ. This time, it will hopefully be us who do the shaping, the holding, the encouraging; us who will be peace makers and mountain guides and finish-line holders, and push-you-on-your-way-ers.

We step out, not on our own, but held by the man whose footprints are heart shaped, who enables us.